- "But hey, who needs a Trojan horse when the alarm is down and your standing army is a dame, a dork and a... drunk?"
- ―Max Payne
A Dame, a Dork, and a Drunk is sixth chapter in Max Payne 3.
This chapter starts with Raul Passos coming in to Max's apartment. Max is sleeping on a table with some alcohol next to him. Passos wakes him up and tells him that their boss, Rodrigo Branco, wants to see them. Upon the arrival, they meet a new face in Branco's office, Armando Becker, who is promising that he will rescue Fabiana and safely return her to Rodrigo. Later on, Max receives news that some "paramilitaries" are surrounding and invading the building. Max has no choice but to kill them in order to protect his boss, leaving Rodrigo in his office prepared to lock down to ensure his safety while Max is taking care of business. So then Max goes with an IT worker to get the systems back online in the headquarters so that Rodrigo can lock the building down. After the building is locked down, Max returns to the office, where he finds Rodrigo dead on a table with a bullet in his head. Max then discovers that there is a bomb under the table on which Rodrigo died, while picking up a broken photo stand of Fabiana off the floor. Max then tries to jump out the window but the bomb explodes and injures him. Throughout chain reaction explosions, the building starts to collapse.
Max tries to leave the building while fighting a few Crachá Preto members, who killed the IT guy. At the end, Max finds a nearly dead paramilitary soldier who is severely injured and is unable to be hostile towards Max, who then asks the soldier why they came to kill Rodrigo Branco, but the soldier replies that they came to kill Max, because he's apparently killed a significant number of them. Max asks the soldier where Fabiana is being held, and the soldier then replies to Max that Fabiana is being held by Comando Sombra up the hill.
- Max Payne
- Raul Passos
- Rodrigo Branco (Killed)
- Marcelo Branco
- Wilson Da Silva (Mentioned only)
- IT Guy (First appearance) (Killed)
- Victor Branco
- Armando Becker
Amidst The Wreckage
Destroy All The Models in The Boardroom
5 Gamerscore or a Bronze trophy
- The name of the chapter most likely references the characters within it - the dame being the secretary, the dork being the IT guy, and the drunk being Max.
- Max repeatedly references a security guard that helped clear the enemies from the building, and tells the secretary to find him for help, suggesting that Max was supposed to have an ally in the mission, but he was cut at the last minute.
- This, along when Max is shot in Just Another Day at the Office, is the only time where Max will not have full health when reloading a checkpoint.
- After the office explosion, Max cannot dual wield for the rest of the chapter.
- For the Xbox 360 version of the game, this is the final chapter on the first disc.