- "But hey, Who needs a Trojan horse when the alarm is down and your standing your standing army is a dame, a dork and a... drunk?"
- ―Max Payne
A Dame, a Dork, and a Drunk is sixth chapter in Max Payne 3.
This chapter starts with Raul Passos coming in to Max's apartment, Max is sleeping on a table with some alcohol next to him. Passos wakes him up and tells him that their boss, Rodrigo Branco, wants to see them. Upon the arrival, they meet a new face in Branco's office, Armando Becker, who is promising that he will rescue Fabiana and safely return her to Rodrigo Branco. Later on, Max receives news that some "paramilitaries" are surrounding and invading the building. Max has no choice but to kill them in order to protect him boss, leaving Rodrigo Branco in his office prepared to lock down to ensure his safety while Max is taking care of business. So then Max goes with the I.T Guy to get the systems back online in the headquarters so that Rodrigo can lock the building down. After the building is locked down, Max returns to the office, he finds Rodrigo Branco, his boss, dead on a table with a bullet in his head. Max then discovers that there is a bomb under the table on which Rodrigo Branco died, while picking up a broken photo stand of Fabiana off the floor. Max then tries to jump out the window but the bomb explodes and injures him. Throughout chain reaction explosions, the building starts to collapse.
Towards the end, Max finds a nearly dead "paramilitary" soldier who is severely injured and is unable to be hostile towards Max, who then asks the soldier why they came to kill Rodrigo Branco, but the soldier replies that they have came to kill Max. Later Max asks the soldier where they are holding Fabiana. The soldier then replies to Max that Fabiana is being held by Commando Sombra up the hill.
- Max Payne
- Raul Passos
- Rodrigo Branco
- Marcelo Branco
- Wilson Da Silva (Mentioned only)
- IT Guy (name unknown) (First appearance)
- Victor Branco
- Armando Becker
- Crachá Preto
Amidst The Wreckage
Destroy All The Models in The Boardroom
5 Gamerscore or a Bronze trophy
Part II Complete
Complete Part II Of The Story
20 Gamerscore / Bronze Trophy
- Max Payne repeatedly references a "Security Guard" that helped clear the enemies from the building, and tells the secretary to find him for help, suggesting that Max was supposed to have an ally in the mission, but he was cut at the last minute.
- This, along when Max is shot in Just Another Day At The Office is the only time where Max will not have full health when reloading a checkpoint.
- After the office explosion Max cannot dual wield for the rest of the chapter.
- For the Xbox 360 version of the game, this is the final chapter on the first disc.